Former RAF nurse shares how Telephone Friendship Groups have helped deal with the loss of her husband

After thrice being widowed, the RAF Benevolent Fund's Telephone Friendship Groups have enabled 80-year-old Gillian Boldon to connect with other RAF veterans who have lost their partners, helping them to deal with their grief while also building new friendships.

Telephone Friendship Groups are, without a doubt, one of the most valued services offered by the RAF Benevolent Fund. The weekly telecom service creates a social platform which members of the RAF Family from all over the UK can take part in, discussing daily life, sharing history, and offering support to one another.

Remembering her past, Gillian said: "After joining the RAF during my nursing career I met an RAF Nursing Instructor, who became my husband, who then he went on to become an Airframe Fitter and won the BEM Medal for his work. After his death and with three young children to support, I began a 35-year career as a professional singer and entertainer which continued full time until I became disabled at the age 67. My late husband also served in the RAF and sadly passed away in 2021."

Gillian’s compromised physical ability means that she must have round-the-clock care and spends most of her time in the comfort of her home in Plymouth.

She said: "I moved from North Yorkshire, and now reside in Plymouth, to be close to my Family, where I have professional care and my Family to help me with my physical disabilities."

The Telephone Friendship Groups offer Gillian a space to support other likeminded beneficiaries, many of whom are also widowed and delight in discussing their commonalities.

Saying: "In my group we are helpful to one another. We know each other's names and which area each of us are living in. Our familiarity to each other helps us to open-up and talk about our troubles, worries and life-changing events.”

Now retired, Gillian has sung the praises of her Telephone Friendship Groups Facilitator, Veronica, for encouraging her group and creating an atmosphere of friendship, hope and honesty.

She said: "The best part about the Telephone Friendship Groups is having Veronica as our Facilitator. She’s brilliant! The success of our group is down to her."

She continued: "Having a good Facilitator is key to great Telephone Friendship Groups."

Grateful for the opportunity to uplift her peers when the daily troubles of life arise – Gillian, who regularly attends 'The Theatre Royal' where she once performed as Dolly Levi in 'Hello Dolly', is thankful for every contribution made by the members of her group.

Saying: "Veronica makes sure that everybody gets to have a say. And I like that because I really appreciate what everybody has to say – it can be most helpful at times. You never really know when you’re going to be told just the thing you needed to hear."

With an impressive collection of life experiences, Gillian is confident that her past, once a scar, can now be used as a healing tool to help friends that she'll remember for a lifetime.

Find out more about why our Telephone Friendship Groups are such an important lifeline.